Spam Box Treasures: Part 5

Well, hellooo! It´s great to have you back. You´re just in time for my out of this world post on my latest spam treasures. Today we´re welcoming Part 5 in the series and I can´t be more proud than I am now knowing that I´ve been blessed with a large amount of wonderful, slightly confusing spam comments. 26 spam comments total! Can you believe that?

Well, 20 of those spam comments were just links, which was a little disappointing. I L.I.V.E for these comments, spammers! Y´all can´t send me a pathetic link. What should I do with links?

Fortunately for me ( and you ), the remaining 6 spam comments were well worth my time. Especially spam comment #6. Whatever you do…. do NOT skip the 6th comment. I promise #6 will be a life and game changer. You´ll either age rapidly or you´ll fall asleep. There´s really no telling. Comment #6 gave me a reason to fetch a drink.

Let´s begin the spam parade!

  1. I abolut am thankful your father is a fan.

 

spam 1

 

2. Aye aye, Captain 3win8 kiosk.

 

spam 2

 

 

3. Ooookay, Myrna * shoulder shrug *

 

spam 3

 

 

 

4.    You could have told me this over wine instead of a pfft comment.

 

spam 4

 

 

 

5. Can rewrite like human, you say?

 

spam 5

 

 

6. The Comment That Never Ends ( including my equally never ending reply ).

 

spam 6

Dude, 70´s fashion? I just LOVE flared pants. Ever since the return of bell bottoms in the early – mid 90´s I´ve been a fan and can´t seem to get away from em.

Oh, Jason Everman. You mean the guy who played for Nirvana? Nirvana, the reason why I wore an oversized red flannel shirt with ripped jeans and Doc Martins. But I have to admit, I wasn´t a fan of the music.

I must say 918kiss pc – you tickled my interest with your Sophomore music choices. I was a HUGE fan of System Of A Down, even managed to go to a few gigs in my early 20´s. Oh, the days * sigh * Did I ever tell you I was in a crowd ( what I learned was the actual mosh pit ) and was nearly beaten to death. I´m short so I received a few blows from elbows. You should have heard my mother when she saw me after I got home. Sheesh. I was also at a Manson concert once. Gotta tell you, though… 45 minutes without an encore for 60 euros. Kind of a rip off, if you ask me. But back to you: Does one need a reason to like SOAD? No. On to the second part of your message…..

 

 

6.2 HAIR?!

 

spam 6.2

Oh, we talking hair now? I absolutely feel you on being a maniac about one´s own hair. Can I tell you a secret? I´m a hairdresser with a master’s degree. So, I actually enjoy cutting hair, too ( sometimes ). There was a time when I hated it so I decided to go to uni and get a degree in chemistry. I am now officially overqualified for my job. * sigh *

The “one of the days” chorus line you mentioned- Sheesh, I misread that one and thought you were talking about the Foo Fighters song “These Days”. Great song but for a minute there I thought we would go back to Nirvana. Because you know the issue with him being the “new” drummer and all that.

The Beatles- right. Wait… what´s wrong with “Hey Jude”? That´s the song I always sing when I´ve had one too many….

Let me read the third and final part of your comment before I sing Hey Jude to you.

 

 

6.3 UNCLEAN?!

 

spam 6.3

Meeh * wave off * Never been a fan of The Used, either. I somehow grew out of that style of music. How can you say The Used scream a lot? System Of A Down is worse.

Honey, what´s this about being unclean? You ain´t washing yourself? I feel that our friendship has already evolved so I´m going to give you a little advice, from one friend to another- I grew up with brothers so I´m in the know-how on how male hygiene works.  Muchacho, you need to wash yourself if you feel unclean.

Back to music: You like breakup albums? Remember when Take That broke up? No, wait- Technically, the band was already done for when Robbie Williams left and the album sans Robbie was for shit. Remember when Guns´n Roses broke up? Pfft. I actually refuse to discuss that one because I get kind of emotional ( and I was 15 at the time. A delicate age for a band to just throw the towel, you know? )

I don´t doubt your mother´s judgement. If she says it rules then it rules. I imagine your mom´s super cool. Mine wasn´t. She nearly killed me when she saw what I did to my new Doc Martins ( the same day I got them I hopped on my bike, put some speed on it and let the caps of my boots glide over the concrete, creating the “used, worn out” look. No one ever wanted new Docs. Then she almost passed out when I took a stone and rubbed it over the knee section of my 501 Levis jeans, creating authentic holes. Mom was not amused, not even after I told her she had no idea what fashion was. She threatened to send me to a home when I presented my new necklace to her ( a dog collar with spikes ). Now, after all the years that have passed she fondly remembers the days when her daughter acted like a possessed person. She also wonders what would have happened if she had actually sent me to a home. Lol.

 

And for some odd reason the strange grunge chic became a book blogger.

me festival
One of my better outfits back in 2002.

 

That´s it for the Spam Treasure Box! I hope you enjoyed the little blast from the private past * wink *

 

Thank you for reading.

Sending much normal, mature love to all the bookish hombres out there ❤

Banner name

Thank The Books It´s Friday

Well, what do ya know… It´s our favorite day of the week- FRIDAY! A good enough reason to unleash the Friday squirrel.

squirrel fuck

With desperate squirrel out of the way I´d say it´s time to talk about what´s happened this week.


 

tula

 

  1.   I discovered that fantasy author Sherrilyn Kenyon suspects her husband poisoned her. Well, this news popped up around mid January but I just found out. That´s some creepy shit right there, if you ask me. Looks like her hubby is a real piece of work. The article here states that he´s done it for financial gain and to ruin her career.  I guess hubby´s not that clever. If he wants financial gain then he shouldn´t want to ruin her career. What an eejit. Give her chocolate then divorce her. And to think her husband´s a lawyer. * snorts *

 

2.   Authors bribing fans to leave reviews on Amazon with Kindles. This is old as fuck. The only difference between the review begging from then and now is that it´s NOW happening publicly, whereas back in the day authors would offer Kindles and stuff within closed social media groups. I really don´t know how to feel about this. I´m torn between wanting to applaud authors for having the guts to bribe and wanting to flat out tell them you can´t buy reviews ( well, technically… you can but that´s not the point ). Oh, and to also exclude book bloggers from said bribery. Da fuq?

 

3.   My apocalyptic BookTube project is launching Monday, 11. Feb. 2019. YAY!

 

4.   More Netgalley approvals came through.

Not sure when I´ll be able to read all the Netgalley gems but Imma hoping it´ll happen this year. Just the thought of it is giving me heartburn.

 

5. My youngest daughter ( 7 ) finished reading her first book. 50 pages! It took her some time but she made it. Her final thoughts ( and I quote ): “The book was stupid.

 

6. Unsuccessful book hunt. Seems like authors are either extremely busy writing or they´re having a creative break at the moment. Aside from Netgalley. That place is buzzing with life.

 

7. I received an early birthday gift from my mother. A biography called

`Going Gray: What I Learned About Beauty, Sex, Work, Motherhood, Authenticity, And Everything Else That Really Matters`. Lord, is that title a mouthful.

Going Grey

At first I thought she had bought the book for herself- I was wrong. She actually believes I´m counting my days. Not funny, Mom. But ( !!! ) Two can play this game and I so happen to be good at it. Soon my mom will be the new and proud owner of `Nursing Home Ninjas`

Nursing Home Ninjas

 

That´s it for the week. For next week I´m expecting a few days with a little more adventure or excitement. Fingers crossed.


 

How was your week? What plans do you have for the weekend? Let´s chat!


 

I hope you all have a safe weekend and enjoy whatever you have planned. ❤

See you all on Mug Monday!

Much love,

Banner name

 

 

Mug Monday & Birthday Month

Welcome back to Mug Monday! So glad you decided to pop in and see what new news I have in store for you.

Let´s get my well-being out of the way before we start this explosive post.

I have the flu…. again. It´s like this never ending nightmare that comes back. I´m a clever one, though. I figured out WHY i´m being attacked by viruses or germs. My girls drag it home from school. I swear on all that´s pink and fluffy, some parents need to learn to NOT send their little angels little shits little precious mini me´s to school when they´re sick. I´m slowly fed up and will probably end up contacting the school principal if this shit continues. Not that she will do anything…. But complaining does improve my mood.

I´ve been successfully living off soup, crackers, dry toast, tea, water and of course… I live in a sea of Kleenex. Fun times.

I wish I had a bathrobe like that.

Back to the topic:

It´s February. This might not mean much in general, other than it´s still winter. But for me, February means much more. It´s my birth month. In a few days from now I get to spend the one and only day of the year being pampered and get showered with Amazon gift cards ( because for some reason my family doesn´t believe in gifting Amazon gift cards on Christmas ).

It´ll be a one man fest ( until the kids come home from school ) and I will make sure to enjoy every single minute of my day without my mother in-law and her absurd demands for cake.

A little private fun fact from my trusty private treasure chest:

My mother in-law truly demands I serve cake and coffee on my birthday. She once explained that it´s not only polite but it´s also sort of an exchange. She gifts me something and I serve cake in return.

In other ( unspoken ) words: I don´t deserve a gift if I don´t have cake. Good thing I didn´t marry her * snorts *

As for books:

Forgive me if there hasn´t been much of that lately ( please re-read reasons above ). It´s been kind of rough for me. And you know what sucks even more? I have untouched book mail I haven´t had the energy to open yet. 5 Amazon and 2 Book Depository packages. I´m gutted.

Nevertheless- I´m determined to get back on track because I´m bored out of my wits.

So, my piss poor attempt at a Mug Monday Feature will hopefully be the start of something better. Voila!

mug stipe

 

See? I have my Kindle fired up and ready. * sigh * Maybe after my nap. And after I tried getting a review scheduled. God, haven´t done one of those in ages.

Okay, that´s it for today. My deepest apologies for boring the bejesus out of you all.

Have a wonderful day, my dear Padawans.

Much love,

Banner name

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On The 13th Day Of Bookmas ( Revealing My Blogger Notes incl. Pics )

The 13th Day Of Bookmas and I´m going to do some major personal note revealing. This is probably going to be the most intimate post you´ll ever get to see from me. Why?

Because you´ll get to see:

  • my * cough cough * shitty handwriting
  • my questionable ideas 
  • the weird blog stuff I plan

And of course, I´ll take it all a step further and reveal a side project I´ve been working on with my oldest daughter ( Don´t worry, it´s book related ).

Take a seat, bookish Padawans. It´s going to get juicy. Fingers crossed that you won´t fall off your chairs out of sheer boredom.

PLEASE NOTE that this post is 100% personal. Meaning this isn´t educational or even meant to be helpful ( although I wouldn´t mind if you do seem to feel moved to use whatever tricks / ideas / tips I reveal. Y´all have my blessings)

But before I grace you with my weird shit  creativity… I´d like to say that none of what´s revealed is in any way a guide or a template for proper book blogging. We all know there´s no right or wrong way to go about this business / hobby of ours. What works for me might not work for others and all that shibaz.
As a seasoned book blogger I´ve learned that keeping a schedule is key to a less chaotic blogger life. With all the books us book bloggers purchase, read and review – We can easily get lost in the paper jungle and end up not being able to tell the difference between up and down. In the beginning of my blogger career I started out with Google calendar. But I ended up hating it so I began going the traditional, old school route by using pen and paper to make notes or keep up with new releases and all that.

 

I´m a pen to paper type of woman and prefer journals over making notes on my phone, etc.. I cannot begin to tell you how many journals I have ( basically because I like to ignore the journal mountain I have growing in my trusty pseudo office ). I use journals to write down all kinds of book blog – ish stuff. Whether it´s for scribbling down new releases, author names, my own ideas… I always reach for a journal.

 

As of now, I´m constantly using these babies.

journals
A journal for everything! 

My Trusty Blogger Journals

 

Work That Shit journal: This is where I write down the authors I want to look up and where I try to shift and mold the post ideas I come up with during the day. Let´s take the Bookmas theme I´ve got going at the moment. It´s in this journal… everything all mapped out.

journal notes xmas
Don´t worry if you see your name / blog name

 

Blogs To Follow journal: This might be strange to some but I do make notes of book blogs I want to not only follow but also keep track of. Here´s some ugly facts: I don´t scroll through the WordPress Reader. Not because I´m not interested… It´s more because I hardly have time between work, the kids and maintaining a household. By the time I go online I´ve missed too much and really don´t want to spend 4 hours scrolling the Reader. I know- It´s an ass move towards the blogs who follow me but I really can´t invest more time than I already am investing. NOTE: This is for WordPress blogs only.

 

Create A Dream journal: Or in other words: My junk journal. This is where I keep literally all kinds of shit. Instagram ideas, blog post ideas, hashtags, book event layouts, spy dates, Skype sessions with authors, bloggers and close friends who so happen to be involved in the book world… It´s all in here and it´s ONE HUGE UNORGANIZED MESS.

journal notes hashtag

Yes. Believe it or not- I have 2 1/2 pages full of hashtags. This started during the time when I thought I could beat the algorithm on Instagram by using the right hashtags. I gave up shortly after because this became exhausting as hell. I also have a page dedicated to Twitter hashtags and Fb hashtags ( because my old ass had to learn the hard way that a hashtag isn´t always the right hashtag )

I also used to keep track of various social media book blog groups / book pages / Streetteams, etc. by writing down the groups I followed ( to save time ). Now I don´t work bookish stuff on FB anymore.

journal blogs to follow

 

Ideas journal: This is a place to think. Write down what works for my blog and what hasn´t worked and what I think could work but still have to think through. This is also the a journal I use to keep track of book costs. I, unfortunately, don´t have money growing in my garden so I like to make lists of the books I buy and keep a tight lid on booksih shopping lists. I also use this journal for my mother – daughter book projects.

journal-notes-eve-and-mommy.jpg
Comparing prices for swag 

Aah, yes. The mother – daughter project I mentioned earlier. In the pic above you can ( barely ) see pricings from various online print services. Eve and I have a side project called The Book Owls where we do book charity. That´s right. I don´t just book blog.

The Book Owls is an organization that helps less fortunate children havebetter access to books.

The idea for this happened when I was with the girls book shopping. Eve caught wind of a mother explaining to her kid that she didn´t have money to buy her kid a book. To my utter shock, my kid walked to the kid and told him “Don´t worry. My mommy can buy you the book.” And that´s what I ended up doing. I also gave my daughter a gentle speech on how she can´t do that without consulting me first. If she had asked I would´ve said no. But she unintentionally put me on the spot. After that I thought long and hard about how to give kids easy access to books.

Trust me- This wasn´t easy and it took me quite a few journals to come up with a solid plan on how to approach this idea. Fast forward a year….

Eve and I are organizing book flea markets for children´s books ( ages 0 – 12 ) where children can sell their own used books for no more than 2 euros per book. The pic above shows the prices for swag we give the young sellers at the end of the book flea market ( including promo posters, etc ). This is a great way to spread the book love with the younger folk. And of course, all this is non-profit.

We also collect used, in good condition, children´s books in the village we live in and bring these to orphanages, hospitals, and to other children organizations.

Right now, the babe and I are working on a book treasure hunt for our young village members. We bought 2 books ( for each gender ), wrapped them in red and blue gift wrap and will announce in the village FB group that we´ll be hiding these books on one of 3 playgrounds. The first children who find the books can keep them.  All they have to do is create a post in the village FB group to let us know that they´ve been found.
If you don´t see a blog post from me from time to time for a few days then I´m actually working on our mother – daughter charity project.

Phew! That was personal. But hey- I promised insight. Now you know I´m desperately trying to buy my way into heaven.

Just kidding. There is no heaven. Let´s take a step away from the charity stuff and move back to the book blog reveals. I have more pics of notes in my trusty journals.

You may have fun now.

journal prepare 1
My apocalyptic book signing event preparation. I feel no shame!

 

journal prepare
No comment.

 

And then there is this gem. Yes. I´m a crazy organized bitch who likes to neatly put anything bookish in a folder.   I have 9 years worth of book paper shit.

This folder holds book signing tickets ( or anything book signing related ), author letters and cards ( yes, I get the occasional thank you and Christmas card ) and of course, my favorite swag. Behold!

journal rare
Oh, yeah. I´m going to RARE, baby. 
journal letter
I live for these notes. ❤

 

journal mon
Because Street team members deserve an actual letter ( and swag )

In the last picture on the left side you can even see a postcard from my first blog, The Divas Book Blog. This I used to send out to authors, signing events and other blogs as a means of self promotion. BTW- That system works wonders.

 

So there ya have it. I´m stripped bare. You know my organized / half organized – half messy / less organized notes. You now know how I actually work my blog. Wait. That´s not true. You haven´t seen my Google Drive yet. Blog notes are worse there.

 

Will any of this help you? I doubt it. That doesn´t mean I wouldn´t find it cool if someone were able to take something valuable away from this post. Even if it´s to NEVER copy my approach to book blogging…. ❤

Now that you know me I think we can get married now. Who´s first? Lol

 

As always… I´m looking forward to reading your thoughts in the comment box below. Feel free to ask questions if you have any. Are you shocked? Stunned beyond words? Or do you keep notes as well? How do you stay organized? Let´s chat. ❤ ❤ 

 

Thank you so much for finding interest in this post. Feel hugged if you enjoyed reading about my book blogger notes.

 

Banner name

On The 11th Day Of Bookmas ( Favorite Reading Snacks )

On The 11th Day Of Bookmas, my true love begged for me… To munch on all the good stuff I can eat with one hand without having to take my eyes away from a book page!

 

Yes, it´s time to tackle the food issue while reading.  Us readers are so good at getting lost in a great book. So good that we tend to neglect our basic needs sometimes ( not including bathroom breaks because we can take books with us to the loo ).

We completely forget our surroundings when invested in a story and sometimes some of us realize we´re hungry when it´s way past dinner time or close to midnight.

I´m one of those people who can ignore the signals my stomach gives off. But not for long. Sometimes my hunger get´s the best of me and I end up with a cheese plate and classify that as “dinner” when I want to finish a book. And sometimes, I just get the munchies and want a simple snack to round-up my nearly perfect reading session. Snacking allows us readers to keep our greedy eyes glued to the pages we hold.

But what foods are considered to be reading foods? Which foods are best suited for reading?

Over the years I´ve developed the talent of blind snacking. I bet you´re asking yourselves what´s so special about eating blind? To be honest – It´s an art. I kid you not.

Try eating a bowl of cereal with milk while reading a book. It´s hard, but not impossible. Or try a spoon full of chili con carne. It took me years to master the craft of eating without messing up a book I was reading. I can do it but do I think it´s necessary? No.

Categorize this under “The Stupid Shit People Do” if you like. I see snacking during reading as a supreme class of awesomeness.

 

What foods are actually great for reading?

 

From my own personal experiences I can say any dry foods are perfect for snacking. When reading some people want to keep it less messy and they want a way to have easy access without having to take their eyes away from their book.

  • Bird food ( pre peeled seeds, nuts, croutons, Pretzels. Mainly stuff you´d choke on without a drink afterwards )
  • Rabbit food ( crudités: raw veggies without dip )

 

And second runner-up are your everyday snack foods.

  • Cheese ( bite size )
  • Crackers / Cookies 
  • Potato Chips / Crisps
  • Sweets / Candy / Chocolate

 

But what if you´re hungry and aren´t so keen on munching a whole bag of potato chips? This is where you start to be more creative with your food choices.

  • Pastries / cake ( because you can shake off the crumbs )
  • Breakfast cereal without milk ( It´s like bird food )
  • Waffles / Pancakes with powdered sugar ( because that too can be removed with a swipe of a hand )
  • Fruits 

 

And then there´s the option of going all hard – core snacking. NOTE: These foods aren´t really suitable to snack on during a reading session. But hey, if you´re hungry you gotta eat, amirite? And you have to make the best of any situation.

  • Dips ( The MESS! )
  • Left over Chili Con Carne ( Too crumbly and leaves stains )
  • Salads ( Rabbit food with dressing. Doesn´t work for me )
  • Spaghetti ( How I wish this would work for me )
  • Soup ( I haven´t met a living soul who´s tried to eat soup while reading )

 

I bet you´re wondering who in their right mind would try to eat Spaghetti while reading. Well…. I tried.

 

We cannot leave out the beverages!

As with snacking, drinking can also be a small adventure when you refuse to put your book down. Why? Because with beverages, there´s more at stake! For one, your pages  ( or half the book )could get wet. Wet pages get wavy when they´re dry. And second- If you´re drinking something with sugar in it ans spill some of the drink on your book it´ll be a sticky mess and you can then kiss that scene you were reading good – bye ( because they´ll be stuck together for life ). The best and safest way to go about this would be by using a simple straw. But who has straws near by all the time? I don´t. But I have a few tricks that can be useful when it comes to drinks and reading.

  • Carbonated drinks are the devil. Although I´m a “sparkly water” person I do not drink carbonated water when reading. The bubbles get in my nose and I end up sneezing. Plus it´s dangerous to open a soda / water bottle when your S.O. danced the Cha-Cha with it minutes before he gave you the bottle. Not only will you be soaking wet, your book will drown too ( and probably everything else within a 20 centimeters radius ) 
  • Hot drinks are brilliant, especially when they´re hotter than f**k. If you can´t take a good sip because of the extreme hot temperature then you can´t make a mess, right? 
  • Drinking wine while reading is like playing russian roulette. It can go well. It can go etremely well until you´ve had one too many glasses and end up slightly tipsy. Then it´s a game of “will I… will I not..?” 

 

So you see… Almost every food can be considered as reading food. And not many drinks are actually cut out for blind reading sessions. And of course, all this is just not important if you´re one of those people who can put a book aside for a few seconds to actually see what you´re eating / drinking. I don´t belong to that fortunate group.

Unfortunately, I´m one of those people who just can´t stop reading and refuses to take a break to eat.

My personal go – to foods are:

  • Pistachios
  • Brownies
  • cheese cake / cream cheese cake pastries
  • Cheese balls
  • Nutella sandwich

And my go – to drinks are Coke and hot chocolate with cream. Those work the best for me.

Tell me:

What are your favorite foods to snack on when you´re reading? Or, do you even snack between pages? Share away!  I´d love to find out what your Food & Read ritual is. ❤

 

Thank you for reading ❤ I hope you enjoyed. ❤

Banner name