The Art Of `Live And Let Live` ( In The Book Blog Community)

” But the world is getting worse and I blame the beginning of it´s demise on social media.”

– Ricky Gervais

 

I bet you saw this one coming, didn’t ya? The Art Of `Live And Let live`. Folks, this is exactly what it is. A post about living and leaving others alone.

This is not a click bait.. For the record: I’m not a click bait book blogger so there will be none of that here.

Normally, I´d go ahead and give you a generalized post on my thoughts regarding the topic at hand. I´d throw in some pros and cons and provide some real examples and include my personal opinion. Not this time. I´ve something else in mind.

Stay factual. Stay realistic. Stay diplomatic. Try to stay neutral. That´s what I try to aim for when typing up my posts. For most of the time I reach my own standards.   I don´t blog about books and book related topics to unleash hell onto others for the sake of personal pleasure. Why am I even telling you all this?

Well, something happened today. Something that had shocked me. I spotted a tweet on Twitter that hit close to home.  And the weird part? It was about my blog post and what it did for other people.

Initially, I had not planned on publishing a post over the weekend. Now I feel like one has to go up. For many of you, this might sound so petty. So annoying.  Trust me- I´m just as annoyed. Please bear with me, dear annoyed non participants. My fingers are crossed that this´ll find an end sooner than later. I have just as much important shit to do.

There has been talk regarding my blog posts. Mind you- this isn´t the first time someone disagreed with one of my posts. But it´s the first time I´m seeing a complaint done behind my back.

My life motto is

`Live and let live.`

 

Unfortunately, this concept is totally alien for many people, It´s easy to live and let live. It´s apparently more fun not to. This also applies for book blogging. Most of the time the things I see happening in the book community are fairly harmless ( by harmless I mean things that don´t have people sobbing in the fetus position at night ). A little bitching here, and a lot of nagging there. Most of the time I find this really great. Opinions are what get conversations rolling. You have an opinion on a topic and share it, even welcome other opinions? I´m in! What I don´t like is when things become personal.

By `live and let live`I´m saying accept what others do and move on. Respect a book bloggers opinion and continue with life as it was.

 

`Live and let live.`

 

Yeah. The offended book committee doesn´t share my life philosophy. They say they do but they don´t.  Instead, these people make it their mission to keep my name within their radars. Because they were offended by one of my posts.
Which posts, you ask? What could be so awful that have people feeling all sorts of uncomfortable? Even feeling personally attacked?

 

The Art Of Pointing Fingers At Book Bloggers

Excuse me for not being a friend of finger pointing at book bloggers. You don´t post links from a book blogger and bash them in a group because you´re fucking unhappy. Have you no common sense?

A post about how unnecessary I feel it is to feel offended by the fakeness of Instagram. My personal opinion on this subject aside- I was told my post offended people. No one cared about my opinion. And it was a positive opinion. I was pro `live and let live`.

Here´s what happened: I was a new member of a Facebook book group and shared a post of mine. Keep in mind that I had been a member for only a short period of time before I shared a link to one of my blog posts. The first comment I received was from the admin.

Anne Carter
Enter a caption

anna2

 
” Just read some fucking books.” A sad response from someone I had only exchanged a few words with in a previous post ( she was moody there as well ). Practically a stranger. So, this is how we speak with group members now? I´m appalled by this attitude and behavior.  We´re a book blog community. You can dislike my post but you are not allowed to be uncivilized. My post was clean. I had an opinion. Take it or leave it. Don´t tell me my post was offensive when in reality, you just didn´t like it. There´s a difference. See the difference.

I will not lie- this has been my top 2019 post so far. I´ve had dream worthy views ( and still counting ). I´m pretty sure the majority of the views on this post had been from the offended committee. Because, how dare I talk about a subject and publish my link in a group for book bloggers! Shame on me for trying to be a part of a group.

After that I left the group. Because I´m not stupid. Once an attitude, twice an attitude.. I´m not sticking around for round 3. So, I left. I dusted my hands off and moved on. Best decision I had in a long shot. Unfortunately for me, one group member followed me to my blog and thought it would be wise to continue what I ended in the group  underneath one of my blog posts. One person hunted me down to give me a piece of her mind. Keep in mind- That pilgrim had her little moment in the group I posted my link in. She wasn´t done, though.

 

 

Turns out, I have no empathy because I don´t care about the feelings of others. My post was “harmful”. No, it wasn´t. This discussion was long done for me before the loyal book pilgrim followed me to my blog.

 

 

So, people who are offended by posts are allowed to post about their feelings and I am supposed to sit back and accept wordlessly? No. That´s wrong on so many levels.

 

Then there´s this gem of mine that has caused more than just a stir. This time more people were involved. This is the Twitter post I spotted. The post about my post. A fellow book blogger defended me on her Twitter page and ended up being blocked. Why? Because I published a post about

Why I Don´t Join Book Blog Tours Anymore

The title says exactly what´s in this post. I reveal the reasons why I don´t participate in book blog tours anymore. How can this be misunderstood for anything else? And this had the bush drums going in a book blogger group. Not sure if I should laugh, cry, feel flattered, be shocked…

The reasons have stemmed from my personal experiences. Things that have occurred in the span of my 10 year book blogging career. I have not, and will not reveal the names of these book tour organizers because they´ve retired 2 – 5  years ago.

Why has this post about my not participating in blog tours been written? What was my motive? Do I need one? No. But I´ll amuse everyone anyway. It felt right to share my experiences. I wanted to share my stuff and maybe help others even if it´s by showing them that they aren´t alone with this. What´s wrong with that? Should I have not posted about why blog tours don´t work for ME anymore? Should I have worded the whole thing differently just to have the approval of the offended party? No can do. That would go against my book blog religion.

 

“Some people just don´t care.”

Here´s something to think about:

What would happen ( after having read an experience post of mine ) if the offended person just sat down and asked themselves how this could have happened to a book blogger? The post is open for discussion. Why not get in touch and ask for details. Ask about specifics instead of feeling offended. Because that´s how it looks like from my end of the stick. “I´m offended. I feel attacked.” When it reality my post was never about others. Just me. What is there to feel offended about? Unless these people felt offended on my behalf. Which I highly doubt.

My experiences are my personal facts. You can have your opinion on my opinion but you can´t feel offended by something I´ve dealt with. That´s ridiculous. Unless you´re offended on my behalf. I still doubt that.

 

To sum this whole thing up:

Believe it or not- I wouldn´t publish anything I don´t like. Should someone feel offended by whatever banal post I deem worthy of publishing then there´s always the option of ignoring me.

It´s simple. If you´re not convinced then try it out for yourselves. It works wonders for me.

People, if you are not able to live and let live then at least try! Try for the sake of peace. You can have a good rant. Make a post out of the topic you want to rant about. Ranting is healthy. The behavior I´ve been unofficially subjected to ( because, technically, I haven´t seen the post in the actual Facebook group. Just saw the tweet and was informed by a blogger friend )  is a low form of confrontation. Behind my back. A questionable act against someone who can´t defend themselves because they´re not in the group anymore.

Here´s another thing to consider:

It was clear the person and I weren´t able to meet eye to eye from the start ( although I tried ). The most logical thing to do would be if both went on our merry ways. I did that. The other person didn´t. The fact that this person has been checking on my posts tells me the person is just waiting for something to feel offended about.

The person who targeted my post stated she had planned  to comment on my post at first. She didn´t. I´m now grateful she decided against it. God knows how many more gray hairs I would have gained after a chitchat.

I am not interested in a discussion with this person anymore. Not now, not ever. Should this person reach out to me for whatever reason I will not react. I´ve reacted enough already. The offended parade is officially over. It´s time to move on.

Here´s a kind reminder for the future book blog community: Stop being fucking dicks.

And start working on social skills. Learn how to agree to disagree. Learn how to respect opinions. Learn to live and let live.

 

On a side note:

I´d like to give a huge hug to the person who posted that tweet. She didn´t tag me and I will not tag her because she has been through enough already by defending my blog post and herself.  And of course a Thank You to the person who sent me the screenshot via DM. Thank you. This is what book blogging should be about. Helping each other and standing up for one another. Because what hurts one of us can hurt another book blogger if we keep silent. Thank you, both.

 

On another side note: 

No book blogger should ever stay silent when they feel they´ve been wronged. Speak up. And if you´re not the type then get in touch with a fellow blogger. We don´t just write reviews. We´re a community.

This has been a long post. Much longer than I wanted it to be. My first thought was to dismiss this whole idea of standing up for myself. But I couldn´t. I could be helping others. I want to help others.

What I don´t want it to approach this subject ever again. It´s done. The joke is around the corner. It´s time to read and review and do other fun shit.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. If you belong to the people who were offended by my posts then do yourselves a favor- Don´t bother commenting. I don´t appreciate wasting my time discussing my crystal clear posts with you. I am not interested.

If you´ve been through the same situation or know someone who has dealt with something similar.. Feel free to share. I´d be more than happy to chat. ❤

 

Much love and don´t forget to share the book love,

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Thank The Books It´s Friday

Friday! I´ve missed you something fierce! Before we carry on we need to give Chuck the Thank Fuck Friday Squirrel some love.

 

squirrel fuck

 

It´s been one of those eventful weeks, my bookish Padawans. To be honest- I haven´t had a schedule this packed in a long while. From Monday till this very day… I´ve been swamped with work, appointments, and other things that make me hate being an adult.

The only thing ( aside from reading ) that has brough me joy was watching Norsemen on Netflix.

 

norsemen

 

I have a ritual at night before I go to bed: Watch a history documentary or a documentary on Australians 72 most deadliest animals ( just to inform myself on what I´ll be missing out on while visiting countries that don´t have deadly animals ). I was in a history mood and couldn´t find anything interesting on Sky ( for those who don´t know what Sky is: It´s like Netflix just more organized ) So I found what I thought would be a documentary on Vikings. I received more than just a docu. . So hilarious. So weird. So my kind of humor. They say Norsemen is Norways finest export. I agree. The slaves are by far my favorite characters. If you haven´t already I really recommend watching this series. It´s so SO damn funny.

 

 

So what else have I done this week besides run around like a headless chicken? Aah, yes. I caught up on some reading. March is a birthday month for my social circle so I can´t get too invested in any heavy reading. Right now I decided to give an easy romance my attention. The lady from my preferred bookstore recommended this “light” 374 page chick – lit romance.

I owe you one

 

She said `I Owe You One` by Sophie Kinsella is a perfect quick read for in between reads. PERFECT! I´m currently on page 69 and can´t say I have any complaints yet. It´s sweet and has a great pace. I´m still suspicious, though. Can´t really trust books these days, can we? Fingers crossed this one won´t be another let down.

 

 

As for the blogging bit- I´ve been super productive!

 


Somewhere between going to the dentist, doing school projects, reading, working, etc… I´ve managed to get some blogging done, as well. And not just working on my own stuff but also going through my WordPress Reader! Yippie! I even discovered new blogs.

** sigh ** It truly feels good to be productive.

 

 

Since it´s been a busy week I decided to do nothing this weekend. No plans. No visiting anyone. Nothing. Just spend my days in ratty sweats with the tv remote control in my death grip.

 

 

Many might find this awful but for me, there´s nothing more interesting than having a stay in weekend. ❤ I live for these moments.

 

What about you? What are your plans for the weekend? What will you be reading? Are you going out? Let me know in the comments below!

 

That´s about it, folks. Time to get my sweats ready because I have a few hours left before the true laziness begins!

Wishing everyone a safe and wonderful time. See you all on Monday!

Much love,

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Mug Monday & Reading Log

Mug Feature:    Beige with mint dots

Book Topic:    Reading Log / Journals

 

Hello, my dear ( nearly forgotten ) Mug Monday friends. It´s so great to be able to welcome you back to my quirky world of mugs and random book topics.

The problem with being away for so long is- You have to wiggle your way back into the routine you slipped out of. You know, catching up… and shit.

But (!!!) during my time away from my precious Mug Monday I did spend time actually using my mugs. Even used real tea. Yes, tea. Not hot chocolate this time. Shocking- isn´t it?

 

 

I had to lay low with the milk this time because my body, the stomach bug ( kindly brought home from our local elementary school ) and milk don´t agree with each other.

Don´t worry. I plan to spare you the gory details on what went down ( or out ).

 

 

So, yes… Tea. From peppermint tea to ginger tea, I drank so much that I now feel healthy.

This unwelcome and highly annoying body situation provided so much time for me to give my beloved neglected amazon shopping cart some love. I went book shopping. What did I buy? Well, it wasn´t books, I can tell ya that much.

March´s book shopping spree turned into a journal shopping marathon. Because I don´t have enough journals as it is. Of course, I need more. And I feel no shame by admitting it.

 

 

So, we have a Mug Monday feature AND 2 little journal moments going on. Behold!

 

muggy
 NOTE: Mug used for short term decoration purposes. ( ain´t nothin´in dat mug )

 

I´m loving this SO MUCH that I´m afraid to touch it. I mean- It´s white and cute and pretty…. * sigh *  I´m obsessed with disliking Mondays and I don´t drink coffee, but that´s not the point. I´ve never had a white journal before!

Then I bought another reading log, or book log… or whatever you like to call it. The thing you use to keep track of the books you´ve read. That thing.

A little before New Years I bought my very first reading log, hoping it would bring some organized system in to my reading. And it worked! Well… sort of. I was on a great path of success until I spilled coke all over it and ruined it. So, I bought another one. the exact same one.

Voila!

read log 1
Center – Reading log, Upper left – Great book 

 

 

Simple in the design and easy to maintain. It has all the bits a reader would need to make notes for possible reviews. All that for little money ( $ 5.50, 4.99 euros )

 

read log 3
Kindly turn a blind eye on the right page. Thank you. 

 

  • Page / book count  ( Told you I´ve been slacking )
  • Title, Author,Publisher, Pub-date, Page count, Book format, review, quotes,
  • Nice nifty side bar for adding additional info
  • Has room for 100 books

Perfect for my personal reading notes ( and shopping lists from the looks of book #7 )

Now, do I think reading logs are a must have for readers / book bloggers? No. This is what I like to categorize as bookish “knick- knacks”. A reading log is fun to have, great if you need it but not a necessity.

I like it and think I´ll be able to stick with the book protocol.

 

Do you use a reading log? How you do keep track of your reading? Let me know in the comments below! 

 

 

I guess that´s it for today, my dear bookish Padawans. It´s time for me to get back to my new tea drinking habit.

I wish each and every one of you a wonderful Monday.

Feel hugged and loved,

 

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Thank The Books It´s Friday

I´m going to skip all pleasantries and head straight for the Thank Fuck squirrel.

 

squirrel fuck

 

You´ll never guess what a week I´ve had. Seriously. Especially yesterday. Jesus Christ on a popsicle…. Remember my last post? Well, it caused quite a stir.

 

 

I guess I struck a chord with my discussion post. Apparently, fake coffee and a somewhat neutral opinion can do that.

 

 

 

Oh! * waves hands enthusiastically * Guess what? I started reading again.

 

 

I thought I´d never find my reading mojo again. But it´s back and I´m more than thrilled about it. So thrilled that I started 2 books. You know, sometimes I truly believe I can´t be helped anymore. Instead of concentrating on 1 book I dive right in to 2.

 

 

But, I´m reading again and that´s the only thing that matters. Now I´m concentrating on `The Kiss Thief` by L.J. Shen.

 

The Kiss Thief

 

You know I love me some great cover image. I thought this was just one beautiful piece of princessy pretty. The lace, the crown, the filters…. Now that I´ve had a closer look at the actual print version I can´t say I´m rooting for the cover as much anymore. There appears to be an antique filter over the image and now everything looks too overdone. Or am I imagining things? Help a book babe out!

 

 

 

 

See what I mean? My print copy ( right pic ) is a little more blurred and yellowish.

Needless to say – I decided to continue `The Kiss Thief` and hope to all that´s pink and fluffy it´s worth the money I spent.

 

The other book I started is a dearly beloved hyped read I´ve been avoiding for years! All I´m going to say is that it´s by Sarah J. Maas and I´m terrified.

 

I also spent some time questioning what went wrong with my ability to be a parent. Because when an angry parent calls you and tells you what their kid heard my daughter say at the playground is not always great.

“Your daughter told my daughter that her dad, your HUSBAND, said that only great songs have the word fuck in them.”

 

 

You know, you sort of try to learn from the mistakes you made with your first kid. I guess husbutt didn´t get the memo.

And I did what any respectable parent would do in that situation.

I told the parent that their kid must have misheard my kid. Speaking with missing front teeth can be adventurous then proceeded to give both husbutt and my youngest death glares.

 

 

From now on  husbutt can deal with angry parents. I have officially retired. I tried my best and decided that the universe needs more cocktails.

 

So, that´s it for this week. Angry comments, angry parents, and a book I truly hope will knock the wind out of my sails because I need that positive blow.


 

How has your week been? What are your plans for the weekend? 

 

Hope you all have a safe and wonderful time.

Much love,

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Mug Monday & Birthday Month

Welcome back to Mug Monday! So glad you decided to pop in and see what new news I have in store for you.

Let´s get my well-being out of the way before we start this explosive post.

I have the flu…. again. It´s like this never ending nightmare that comes back. I´m a clever one, though. I figured out WHY i´m being attacked by viruses or germs. My girls drag it home from school. I swear on all that´s pink and fluffy, some parents need to learn to NOT send their little angels little shits little precious mini me´s to school when they´re sick. I´m slowly fed up and will probably end up contacting the school principal if this shit continues. Not that she will do anything…. But complaining does improve my mood.

I´ve been successfully living off soup, crackers, dry toast, tea, water and of course… I live in a sea of Kleenex. Fun times.

I wish I had a bathrobe like that.

Back to the topic:

It´s February. This might not mean much in general, other than it´s still winter. But for me, February means much more. It´s my birth month. In a few days from now I get to spend the one and only day of the year being pampered and get showered with Amazon gift cards ( because for some reason my family doesn´t believe in gifting Amazon gift cards on Christmas ).

It´ll be a one man fest ( until the kids come home from school ) and I will make sure to enjoy every single minute of my day without my mother in-law and her absurd demands for cake.

A little private fun fact from my trusty private treasure chest:

My mother in-law truly demands I serve cake and coffee on my birthday. She once explained that it´s not only polite but it´s also sort of an exchange. She gifts me something and I serve cake in return.

In other ( unspoken ) words: I don´t deserve a gift if I don´t have cake. Good thing I didn´t marry her * snorts *

As for books:

Forgive me if there hasn´t been much of that lately ( please re-read reasons above ). It´s been kind of rough for me. And you know what sucks even more? I have untouched book mail I haven´t had the energy to open yet. 5 Amazon and 2 Book Depository packages. I´m gutted.

Nevertheless- I´m determined to get back on track because I´m bored out of my wits.

So, my piss poor attempt at a Mug Monday Feature will hopefully be the start of something better. Voila!

mug stipe

 

See? I have my Kindle fired up and ready. * sigh * Maybe after my nap. And after I tried getting a review scheduled. God, haven´t done one of those in ages.

Okay, that´s it for today. My deepest apologies for boring the bejesus out of you all.

Have a wonderful day, my dear Padawans.

Much love,

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