Books & Wine Monday: Advice From The Elderly On How To Survive The Heat

Hello and welcome back to Books & Wine Monday.

( Apologies for the non-bookish post and for the missing book + wine pic )

I hope everyone´s been doing well these past few weeks. Personally, I can´t complain. Life, with all its current difficulties, hasn´t been too harsh on me. How can it be when you sit in front of a fan and a portable air conditioning system from sunrise to sunset.

Life is grande when your eyelids don´t sweat. It´s also wonderful when you don´t produce boob and ass crack water.

I know, I know. Body fluid talk isn´t flattering. But I don´t really care. It´s hot. I´m melting. I need to complain. 38 C in the shade ( 100 F ) isn´t exactly my idea of living a good life if you know what I mean?

Speaking of living life- I haven´t done much reading this month. I can´t even remember if I read a book last month. I´ve been too busy collecting ancient advice from every elderly woman living in my area on how to battle indoor heat. Because you know, I live in a country where A/C only exists in grocery stores and some cars.

What I loved most about asking these elderly women ( I´m sure they are somewhere around their 80s ) was how willing they were to pass down their useful information and smart ass advice. Thanks to Gertrud from around the corner I now know I shouldn´t open the house door at all * insert major eye roll *. The other ladies, though, had some steady tricks they swore worked.

  1. Keep the shades down during the day but open your windows at night. Good idea but not really something I wanted to do since we don´t have fly screens on our windows. By opening our windows at night we´d be eaten alive by anything that has wings. Still, I can see this working.
  2. Open the windows at night and hang a cold wet towel over the curtain rod. Leave overnight and remove the wet towel before the sun rises. Then repeat. I figured this would be more effective for me because the towel would prevent any bugs from getting in. I tried this method out and… it works!!
  3. Build a swamp cooler. This one wasn´t new to me because my brothers and I used to build these when we were kids. Now, as an adult, I can´t seem to find the energy in this scorching heat to get in the oven ( that´s what I call my car now ) to get crushed ice ( another luxury we Europeans don´t always have in our homes ). But I will say this: If anyone does manage to get some ice just put it in a bucket and let the fan blow at it. The results aren´t enormous but the semi-cool air helps a little.
  4. Isolate your walls better. Yeah, that one really helped. Do I look like I´m going to tear down my house right now and spend a stupid amount of money I don´t have? Come up with a better one, Emma.
  5. Spend time in the basement if you have one. To be honest- This worked the best for me. It not only cooled me off but also made me aware of how much stuff I need to get rid of.

Then there were things like stay in the shade and drink cold drinks, buy a pool and sit in that all day, buy that new cooling pillow, etc. As much as I enjoyed these trinkets of wisdom I found they only work really well if you act fast, are on time or if the sun isn´t trying to melt your body and soul. Either way, I´m ready for Autumn and Winter.

Fingers crossed the weather will cool down pretty soon so I can get some much-wanted reading done. `Cause, I do miss reading. I never thought I´d say this one day but… I kind of miss writing reviews, too.

So, what did we learn today? That asking the older generation for advice is actually a good idea. Most were delighted that I came around, except for Gertrud. She wasn´t too pleased that I interrupted her daily plant watering routine. I guess that´s it for this week. I shall now try to peel my legs off this wooden chair so I can feel like a human again.

Thank you for reading this blog post. I hope you enjoyed it.

I hope each and every one of you has a wonderful week. Be sure to share the book love.

4 thoughts on “Books & Wine Monday: Advice From The Elderly On How To Survive The Heat

  1. Eurgh, heat, awful weather.😂 It has been cooler in the UK the last few days, but today seems very mild and muggy and it is only 8.30am. Also, some twat said it was cold so the store where I work has put the heating on.🤬😤

    Ass crack and boob water, anything sells, bottle that bad boy up and sell it, I’m sure there’ll be some weirdo’s somewhere who would pay for essence eau Gana or Swampy tit spray.😂

    Have to say I’m shocked, when I read the post title I presumed that it’d be you giving advice on how to stay cool as you are elderly.😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That twat needs to be hunted down! How rude is that?! HAHAHAHA. Yeah, I don´t think people would buy boob water or ass crack water. We still live in the age of worn panties being sold on Ebay. Lol. It´s not the book water era yet.
      ELDERLY?! I am officially offended by friend. Like, over the top offended. Only cake will be able to right things again. LMAO

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yeah, hunted down and beaten, maybe even killed and the body buried deep in the woods.😂 Yeah, there is no middle ground.😜

        Oh, pfft, if you can’t find a buyer for boob water or ass crack water then you aren’t looking in the right places, I mean, people buy anything and pervs perv over anything.😂

        Cake, yeah, not happening.😜


  2. Oh where do I start! I love your candor here, not that that’s necessarily new to you but yes, sweat sliding down the body just because is annoying. Too all the men complaining about wearing a mask for certain times of the day, SHUT IT and try a bra all day. Lol. Perhaps your lady friends have advice for that? 😉

    I spent the first two months of summer with a broken A/C. Now that it works again I swear I am cool (pun not intended) with 79-80F, just as long as it’s cooler than outside. I don’t need 75 or below. But I am grateful in a really weird way for the experience of the heat. I guess it taught me. And one thing I certainly did that you named above (I’ REALLY sorry you don’t have screens) was keep doors and windows closed during the day then open windows at night. However when you live in a neighborhood there’s only so much you can do that because I don’t want my world visible to passers-by and I don’t want to leave the back slider open to weirdos or predators, or anyone for that matter! Nevertheless, fans became my BEST FRIEND. Ultimately I broke down and got it fixed because my critters were suffering for too long.

    I love that you even went to the ladies. We sure can learn from our elders, or at least laugh.They must think we’re pathetic for complaining so much. Lol. But I tell ya, the idea of only stores having A/C is…different. I do hope you find more relief soon. Do you audio book? That might make sitting sprawled out in front of a fan a little bit easier! Audible has a 2 for 1 credit sale happening and ending in 3 days (?). If so, let me know if you need any recommendations!!

    Good luck!


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